Dusk had faded to night. Everyone was lined up to the left, the dust swirling and settling momentarily on every surface before blowing away past the headlights and taillights of 3 rows of cars, 30 deep to the entrance... and to the right, open slots. Dozens. All with wild women and men shouting, enticing, waving and flailing their neon sticks and flashlights and twirling headlamps... anything they could use to attract the fools in the long caravan lined up 30 cars deep. The fools stayed glued in line, either oblivious or stuck in herd mentality and utterly ignoring the frantic welcoming committee waiting for them a dozen yards away to the right.
I cut across traffic, from the furthest left lane to the waiting opening slot of a long legged half naked Swedish girl all bedazzled in rave brightness and an excitement and enthusiasm that welcomed me home, even though it was my first time there.
jay looked at me disbelievingly as I explained that virgins were required to roll in Playa dust and ring a bell while loudly decrying "I'm not a virgin anymore!".
We flashed our entrance ticket to the Swede and she calmed jay by telling her that there was no official requirement to roll around, but not ringing the bell and yelling would be poor sport. jay seemed relieved. However, she was in such good spirits I knew I could get away with a little mischief.
We stepped from the truck, shoes making silent crunchy indentations on the moonlike playa ground. I walked around the front of the truck and jay followed from the passenger side. The Swede met us at the bell and we stood around chatting for a minute as the fools still kept in line to the left... and continued to fail at entrance. In fact, the line had grown while the distant welcoming volunteers on the right looked absolutely bored. I felt sorry for all those volunteers working the 3 rows of impatient burners trying to rush in, and also for the poor bored souls all the way on right who hadn't seen a car the entire time and didn't appear to be seeing any in the near future either. If they'd been toll road booths half the highway would have been shut down.
Anyway, as I continued to analyze Burning Man Entrance Traffic Design and Planning jay walked up to the bell, pulled back the bar and gave it a somewhat gentle, yet loud clang and yelled, "I'm not a virgin anymore!"
We all laughed joyously, immaturely, demurely, and then I stepped up. My masculine ego wouldn't let me clang gently and I smacked it a bit harder than intended. I believe I yelled the mantra of lost virginity but I couldn't be sure anyone heard it. I certainly hadn't over the ringing in my ears. We all laughed again.
Looking over mischievously at jay I asked her "Are you ready?" She looked at me sideways understanding that I didn't mean ready to enter Burning Man... but not quite sure what I did mean. She nodded in good sport and I swept her up in my arms, knelt down with her in a bear hug and rolled us both into the dust. She yelled, playfully angry, ant then we kissed. The Swede cheered us on.
We got back into the truck, taking much of the lakebed with us and waved goodbye to the bright bright-eyed long legged greeter and also to the long line of fools... giving a couple honks of the horn for good measure.
Then we were home.
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Burning Man 2018
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