When it Rains, it Pours

When it rains i wish it was snow.... 2008... after the motorcycle accident and re-learning how to walk and managing to stay current in school...           Wait For It...



My girlfriend left me for another man. In her defense; she did stay with me through most of my recovery and, as far as i know, she never cheated on me. And, I never really gave her any reason to stay and quite a few to leave. I think i miss our friendship the most.

My hospital expenses (CMS had guaranteed to cover the entire bill) will not be paid because I had student health insurance (that only covered 50K), but, get this; if i had had no insurance at all... the entire bill would have been paid. So, the punishment for being responsible enough to have some health insurance? a $100,000 debt.

I am completely recovered from my motorcycle accident, no pre-existing conditions at all.

My car was stolen and I had all my business stuff in the trunk... and the insurance had lapsed. I don't even care about the car, but i am upset about being out-of-business. Not that it was a grand business but i had worked really hard to finally get a small fleet account.

So... Yeah... I am alone, in huge debt, my body is perfectly fine, and i have no means of livelihood. too dramatic perhaps? Its not all bad, there are plenty worse things that could have happened... honestly, i am ok being alone. I make the occasional obligatory attempts at romance; but truth be told i am not lonely in love, just alone. Both will change with time, but which first i am not so sure. On the matter of debt... if you compare my debt to the National Debt of 10,663,558,917,926; it is only .00000018% (18 hundred millionths of a percent). And my next student loan is this January, so i will still be able to pay my bills... as for my long-term debts, I have little doubt about my ability to earn a living. So, 2008 has not been the best year of my life. In fact, without doubt it has been the worst. But i am alive, and i have good friends and good family. So... 2008 is. Always better than is-not.

i think that i prefer to go through troubled times in winter, so that even when the rain stops and the sun comes out there is still the comforting cold and dark and bitter winter nights with those slivered thumbnail moons; instead of the bright, breezy, lazy, laughing summer. But i can't wait for the summer, by that time i will be ready for it. A good breezy, lazy summer laugh will do me good.

i owe my friends and family a thank you. i know how tough life is sometimes and i respect how much i have been given and taken care of by everyone. They may not be even close to perfect, but i want them all to know that i am thankful for everything they have ever done for me and i want them all to know that i will always forgive any faults or transgressions; i only ask the same of them :) So... My new years resolution: Completely forgive everyone of everything... And no alcohol until, at the absolute soonest, Jan.1st 2010 (Year of the Tiger). I can say in honesty that i have already been a teetotaller for a month. Not even a sip. That means 2009 is going to be a 13 month tough year. I really like beer, and absinthe, and whiskey, and wine, and... its going to be a very tough year... but a good one, i can feel it. I had other resolutions to add, but i think these are enough.

(January 2011 Addendum: 2010 was balls. But this year is lookin pretty good)

(Feb. 2012 Addendum: 2011 wasn't bad. This year is lookin' even better. Back to Seattle i go.)